When we write resumes we generally tailor our "skills" to the jobs we want. But I feel like people are missing out on a lot of what else we can do, which is why on my next job hunt I'm totally including these fucking sweet ass skills I have acquired...
1. Without counting I can somehow grab the exact number of forks, knives, and napkins I need to roll a set amount of silverware. EVERY TIME YO
2. I can tack up a horse in under 2 minutes. ENGLISH ONLY SON
3. I can predict tone and beat changes in songs the first time I hear them. I GOT THAT BOOM BOOM POW
4. I can spider a basketball. ALL DAY
5. I can build Ikea furniture by myself. Even though they totally tell you not to. I'M CRAZY INDEPENDENT YO
6. I'm super good at spelling. SECOND GRADE SPELLING BEE RUNNER UP 1993
7. And grammar. OXFORD COMMAS ARE MY JAM
8. Being the only person in my office that cares about recycling. I LOVE THE EARTH AND SO SHOULD THESE BITCHES
9. Drawing people as their spirit animals. NO DUDE YOU ARE NOT A TIGER, YOU'RE A SEAHORSE
10. Not being a gossip. JUST KIDDING I DO THAT SOMETIMES, LET'S BE REAL
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